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Message from Fiona & Tim Tuomey, Parents of Milly Tuomey

620 weeks and 6 days – that’s how long we had our beautiful daughter Milly in our lives. She was loving and greatly loved; fit, healthy, connected, engaged and talented.

When we discovered out of the blue, that our child had told her friends on Instagram that she had chosen the day that she would die, we couldn’t believe it. We did not know what to do and so, we did what we thought we should do to keep her safe. 

The only safety plan given to us during this time was “If you are worried, go to A&E or your GP”.  There were no other ‘safeguards’ offered to us on how we could keep her safe. We were terrified.  We had anticipated that when a child expresses a desire to die as our child did, that a child psychiatrist would be immediately appointed as the ‘gatekeeper’ of care. We discovered that there are currently no clinical protocols in place when a child has a mental health crisis. In 21st century Ireland, this is simply not acceptable. 

Milly died by suicide on 4th January 2016.

Milly’s death was part of the suicide statistics for 2016. But, behind that statistic was a beautiful child who was not given the best chance to survive her mental health crisis. We had hopes and dreams for Milly. We do not ever want to think about another parent going through what we have gone through. 

There were 187 road fatalities in Ireland in 2016. The statutory body, the Road Safety Authority, has been successful in saving lives, improving roads, vehicles and driver habits. However, three times more people die by suicide every year.  We wonder why there is no Suicide Prevention Authority to safeguard and regulate suicide prevention services in Ireland.  Currently, there are not even 24/7 Mental Health Crisis Centres in Ireland either.  Fiona & Tim Tuomey – Dublin

Note from 3Ts:  We thank the Tuomey family for bringing 3Ts proposal for a Suicide Authority to the attention of the Irish public. 3Ts believe that only a Suicide Prevention Authority akin to the Road Safety Authority will save lives lost to suicide by ‘ring-fencing’ funds. This was key to the success of the RSA, in that it is free to govern & regulate itself and all elements of road safety outside of the remit of Government.  You can learn more and support us in our campaign by clicking on the links below:

 

Bereavement Support: If you are struggling with bereavement by suicide, you may find some helpful information in our Bereavement Support page, our short video on Bereavement by Suicide or our Self-Help eGuide on Bereavement.  

Crisis Helplines available 24/7  Samaritans freephone 116 123 Pieta House on 1800 247 247